Divorcing parents face new challenges. Some do this well. They leave the lines of communication open and are genuinely able to separate marital problems from parenting issues so that kids still see both parents as a united front, supporting them. That is where you want to be, and if you're not there yet, you need to get there. But when parents are so hostile to one another that allegations start flying back and forth, it may be a good idea to try out one of the below apps for communication with the other parent in writing.
There is a lot of sound research that says exposing kids to parental conflict is not just bad, it can actually have long-term effects on their brains' hard-wiring. Kids who have experienced nasty divorces are more likely to have their own problems relating to others, empathizing with them, and may even have higher rates of substance abuse. So the bottom line is whatever you have to do NOT put your children in the middle, do it. The apps below are frequently used by divorcing couples who cannot talk to one another civilly in person or who fear the consequences of not putting their discussions in writing.
These apps also have the ability to share calendars for kids' events and appointments, share treatment providers' info, and share requests for payments for things like extracurricular activities or other out-of-pocket expenses. They all have the advantage of saving conversations so that there is no undocumented he said/she said, or at least much less of it. AppClose has a text messaging service that is like regular texting, but if there is any problem documenting was said, texts can be downloaded for the judge, attorneys, or mediator/arbitrator. Talking Parents is an email-like platform that organizes conversations by topic (AppClose and Our Family Wizard also have this). Our Family Wizard, I'm told, has a bunch of bells and whistles and is subscription based. Check out discounts offered for military service members as these can help.